Christmas time is always hard. My boyfriend and I would always celebrate Christmas BIG. Birthdays and Valentines etc. could pass by with just a dinner but Xmas was the BIG deal.
We would do 12 days of Xmas where you picked a mini gift from a stocking everyday for 12 days leading up to Xmas and then the opening of the main gifts on Xmas itself. After he died I think Christmas for me would have totally died too if not for his nieces and nephews.
I continue the tradition of buying the six of them that live here gifts from the both of us (another three live away). Without them I probably would pay no attention to Christmas at all on the actual day.
My family is huge so Xmas eve and Xmas day itself is spend visiting a lot of different households. While it is nice to see everyone I’m glad it’s a once a year affair.
It gets tiring having to answer the same questions all the time, mainly – so you don’t have a new boyfriend YET?. But also everyone else my age is married or has children so they’re in a different stage in life (they’re yelling after husband or said children while I sit in a corner blogging poems and so forth).
Funnily enough every year I think JUST for a moment, maybe by the next year’s Xmas I will have someone to bring too. (LOL- never happens).
I suppose Xmas really is for children so I don’t mind keeping it up for my nieces and nephews while they’re still young. But I do wonder if someday Xmas will mean more than that to me on a more personal level again.