Anyone who has an addict in their life knows the utter nerve wracking feeling that overcomes your being when it’s a day that your addict is supposed to get money.
Are they going to spend it all on drugs? Not pay any bills? Owe ppl? Relying on an addict to do things that seem responsible to the average person is a trying task.
We know we should not be codependent and have our happiness be reliant upon how the addict is doing… But that’s hard. There’s always a part of you that feels just a little less stressed and just a bit happier when your addict makes it through a day without using.
My addict binges, so on a day like today when he would have access to money there’s no guarantee he might return home for days. But this time he didn’t go anywhere. In fact he let us control his spending of money so bills were actually paid and groceries bought. (A rare occurrence).
I would be lying if I didn’t say that this event didn’t play a part in my having a good day. A day that could be total chaos, anger and depression passed by with us all unscathed.
While there is always tomorrow… Today was a good day.